Farewell Food Tour 2010 ----- CANCELED!

Yes, sadly, it's true.  Never ever schedule your Farewell Food Tour during the same week that you have your yearly physical.  :-(

My doctor is on a diet and she's taking it out on me by making me diet, too.  Now, of course, I was already working on this diet stuff on my own.  But I wanted to do it my way.  A two-week tour of my favorite restaurants, eating my favorite blimpo foods.  But no-o-o-o-o.  Dr. Evil says she wants to see me again in 3 months, and she wants me to be 13 pounds lighter.  The only good news in all of this is that I thought I weighed 210 pounds, but on the doctor's scale, I weigh 203!  Yay!  I've already lost 7 pounds!  I know.  It doesn't work that way.  But it didn't hurt to try.

So now I'm choking down on whole grains and rabbit food.  Not so bad, actually, except for one tiny little problem.  I have Irritable Bowel Syndrome.  I don't do so well with a lot of fiber and veggies.  Are my bowels irritable?  Oh yeah.  They're pissed off!  I spend more time in the bathroom than anywhere.  I have a permanent indented toilet seat ring on my tush.  I have to open the bathroom window every time I go and then little birds fall from the sky and the squirrels keel over.  It's not a pretty sight.

Anyway, instead of having my McDonald's hash browns or cinnamon melt for breakfast this morning, I had a reduced-fat peanut butter sandwich on whole grain wheat bread.  Every Wednesday, the gang at work and I go to Skyline for lunch.  Did I have 2 chili cheese sandwiches and a big slice of chocolate cake?  NO!  WAH!  I ate a baked potato with just a pinch of cheese on it and a garden salad.  Where's the fun in that?  Okay, it was actually pretty good.  But it wasn't chili!

I wouldn't mind it so much if I had just gotten to do the Food Tour first.  Now I have to wait 3 months before I can have nachos and cheese at the movies or the sampler plate at Friday's or the fish and chips with a jar of tartar sauce at Frisch's.  With my luck, I will lose the 13 pounds and want to keep going with the diet.  I'm screwed!

But life isn't all about just food.  It's also about.....food! :-)

(And before any of you get on me about my spelling of "CANCELED"....the preferred spelling is with one "L", not two.  I know this.  I'm a writer!)